Vulnerability

By definition, vulnerability is the quality or state of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed, either physically or emotionally. That definition is kind of scary, but being vulnerable doesn't have to be. I've been making it a point to work on allowing myself to be more vulnerable in my personal life because I have been known to have a bit of a rocky exterior, but also because it just feels better being able to feel all of my feelings and express them too. 

As I've gotten older, I have learned that being vulnerable is less about being "weak" (as a lot of us have been conditioned to think of it as) and more about being in touch with myself and willing to let down walls I've built up to hide behind.

For me, allowing myself to be vulnerable felt like I was inviting people to hurt me. Like I mentioned before, I was always shown that vulnerability is a sign of weakness. I was taught to keep my feelings to myself, not let anyone see me down, and certainly not let anyone close enough to catch me slipping and hurt me. Recently, I've come to understand that I can't live life in anticipation that I'll get hurt or taken advantage of. I can't force myself to be this hard, inaccessible person all of the time. There is no reason for me to.

I still struggle with this. Anyone who knows me personally knows it has been a hurdle. 

Vulnerability is important because it is the key to connecting to other people. Vulnerability is allowing yourself the space to open up to others. I don't think that relationships work without it- whether romantic, platonic, familial, or otherwise. We have to be open to lay our cards out on the table in order for any connection to be real. Vulnerability in any relationship, from both parties, paves the way for building trust, empathy, and understanding. On top of all of that, allowing yourself to be vulnerable with a person you care about is an opportunity to foster a stronger sense of intimacy amongst you both- romantic or not, intimacy is important too. 

Aside from what vulnerability can do for your relationships with others, it can work wonders for your relationship with you. That's more important than anything. Allowing yourself to walk in vulnerability can help you process with your emotions more effectively- both negative and positive emotions. I think it shows up the most when dealing with negative emotions. When you let yourself acknowledge those less than desirable feelings instead of trying to force them down or act like they don't exist, you're doing yourself a huge favor. Being vulnerable allows you to be open to change and open to taking chances, and it allows you to understand and adapt new perspectives.

We need to allow ourselves to be vulnerable. 

It takes work to break down walls and leave them behind, but it's vital for growth and fruitful relationships. Challenge yourself to be a little more vulnerable than your usual today. It's worth it.